The newest addition to our family, Steve Hill, is friendly, kind hearted and loves a challenge. He is constantly being pushed to better himself, usually through doorways into life threatening situations.
A purveyor of fine fables and whimsy, Jim Stine is our resident yarn spinner. So, if you’re looking for a tall tale, Jim’s your man. Just don’t ask him anything to do with the supermarket… He’s got no idea.
One of our longest running members of staff, Tony Campbell is an accident prone, hypochondriac who is the only person to have ever appeared in the elusive accident report book. He’d be a much more valued member of staff, if he could finish stacking those bleedin’ shelves.
Blair Yaga (Blair)
In our constant dedication to health and safety, we only hire the best and Blair is pure magic. Using her own cleaning concoctions based on arcane recipes, she keeps the supermarket cleansed and lemony fresh. But for the love of Hecate, don’t ask her to do her job.
Larry is [blank] security guard. He served as a [blank] of Her Majesty’s [blank]. He [blank] dishonourable discharge due to [blank] involving [blank] commanding officer [blank] big gay unicorn [blank] fairy cakes. He [blank] is [blank] a [blank] massive [blank] coward.